Lots of them (well, I used to but that's another story).
I rarely use filters since I like the natural colors of the world around me.
But I have a lot of communication filters that I've recently created for my Master.
Not because he asked for them, just because they are appearing.
The last few months, the communication between us has been breaking.
Not completely but in a few key places.
And it is spreading.
Like a, well, I don't know what but I find I have more filters each week.
As we sit at a table at a restaurant chatting with friends, you reach under the table and place your hand on my leg.
I jump imperceptibly; surprised at your small sign of affection.
I hope that you don't notice my surprise.
Simultaneously, my mind wanders to how you must do the same with your other woman.
I smile and realize that I'm not fully enjoying your love.
I shrink inside without being able to help it.
Gazing Filter
We have always had these sweet loving moments where we simply gazed at each other.
Across the room.
Sitting quietly next to each other.
Waking up and snuggling.
You whisper sweetly to me that you love me.
And then something creeps into me.
I wonder if you say the same thing to your other woman.
My heart skips and shrivels just a bit.
The moment loses some of it's potency.
I've lost something that is sublime.
I hope you don't notice.
There is nothing I love better than to run my fingers along your curves.
To appreciate the small of your back.
To hear you sigh when I lightly touch your collarbone.
To feel you relax when I stroke your cheek.
To press my naked breasts against your chest.
To feel your powerful legs.
And I know it's sounds crazy but I love feeling the hair on your legs graze mine.
But (isn't it always about the but?),
It only takes a few seconds and the moment of joy is gone.
I think about how 'she' can do the same thing.
How she can appreciate your shape.
How she can enjoy your soft skin.
How she can make you sigh and moan.
I am lost.
Sex Filter
Sigh, to feel your desire for me.
The delightful sting of your pinching fingers.
Your strong grip on my wrists make me writhe and squirm.
It excites us both.
Your hard cock pressing against me.
My breathe coming faster as I become more aroused.
You whisper in my ear something about how you would play with me and 'her'.
My breathe stops.
My heart stops.
My passion is tempered.
I want you.
I want you WITHOUT her in the room (real or imagined).
Even if she isn't there and you don't mention her, she is there in my mind.
I fight the tears.
Unless you spank or pinch me, then they flow freely.
I know you sense that the tears are more than the physical pain.
I know you want to free me from the bonds of my breaking heart.
But I know you do not realize the depth of my despair.
You enter me and I only can think of when you fuck her.
She is in the room.
The elephant in the room of my mind.
There is no letting go for me.
There is no pleasure for me.
Flying Filter
Flying.
Something so incredibly special.
Something that I had heard about but had no idea what it felt like; until you.
The first time this happened, we were both in awe.
It feels like a spiritual experience that I share with you.
Something that reaches beyond a normal human connection.
The most special sharing gift I have every had with anyone.
Flying could have never occurred between us with any barriers.
All barriers (aka filters) became unknown with you.
Now, they are returning.
The barriers that I happily banished.
Return as strong as ever.
With reinforcements being added each day.
I want to tear them down so badly but I cannot.
I must protect myself.
And to protect myself from you is to lose the richest treasure I ever had.
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