Happy

Many in the poly world, the poly elitists, say that to be a good partner, you must be happy for your partner to have another.
If you are a rational person, a thinking person, a person not stuck in old-fashioned views, you must be happy for your partner to get busy with another person.
They call it compersion.
The made up word by the polys for the so-called joyful feeling that you have when your spouse had a great time banging someone else.

There is no such word.
Go ahead, look it up.
It doesn't exist in the dictionary.
The polys made it up to make themselves feel better about fucking other people while their spouse is at home miserable.

Sure, I want my husband to be happy.
I like it when he is happy.
I'm delighted when he feels his power.
I'm even more delighted when he feels his power over me.

When he comes home after fucking some other woman (not the word I want to use but I'll be polite), I can't say I feel like doing the happy dance for him.
In fact, I don't even want him to touch me.
I'm about as far from happy as I can be.

I guess I'm not rational.
Or a thinking person.
I must be old-fashioned (although no one I know would say I was that in any way, shape or form).

I'm not happy.
Despite trying to be.
I'm miserable.

Happiness doesn't live here anymore.